New Features!

In response to popular demand, we have added some new features to our benclosures!

For those who want to control the creepiness of the cabin, we now offer an "Opaque-0-meter," which looks similar to a light dimmer. Place it inside the benclosure to allow the spirit to control its transparency, or keep it on yourself to mess with the spirit and never let it know when no one will be able to see it! Perfect for an extended revenge!

We also now have "friends" suddenly pop into the picture whenever someone has violated the sanctity of the benclosure.

To view our two new features, play the video.

Gnomes!

Benclosures now work for pesky gnomes as well as humans! Do you have a pesky gnome who just won't leave your front yard? Don't try to kill him, Benclose him instead!

High Tech Benclosure!

For all you techies out there, we have the perfect Benclosure! It allows you to surf the Internet or check on your stocks from the comfort and security of a traditional Benclosure. Supplies are extremely limited, so call 1-888-BEN-CLOZ to reserve yours today!

The Perfect Babysitter!

Finally, Benclosures are not just for adults! We are proud to introduce the Baby Benclosure. Moms and Dads, are you having trouble finding that perfect babysitter? Are you just looking for a few minutes alone with your spouse? Look no further than the Baby Benclosure. Simply sit your baby in our Baby Benclosure chair, spread the patented ash-like material, and you're ready for a night on the town without Junior!

Benclosures for those on the go!

Just released, the Benclosure version 2.0 is perfect for those of you who want to sit still without sitting still! Our newest Benclosure includes the patented ash-like material in the rolling frame of our patented Benclosure chair. Now you can enjoy your Benclosure while also catching some sun at the beach! Supplies are limited, so contact us today for further details on the new Benclosure version 2.0.

Forrest Gump Testimonial!

Hello, my name is Forrest. Forrest Gump. When I was a young man, I had lots of adventures. Truth is, I couldn't stop running around all the time. That made it hard for my Jenny to find me. I was always running off on some adventure or another. Then my mama told me about Benclosures. She even bought me one for my birthday. Now I sit on a bench at the bus stop eating chocolates and talking to people all day. They like hearing about my adventures and I don't have to buy a new pair of shoes every week from all that darn running around. Benclosures changed my life!

Mark Twain Testimonial!

My name is Mark Twain. Some of you may have read my moderately successful novels, The Adventures of Tom Sawyer and The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn. Well, let me tell you about my experience with Benclosures. I used to wander around men's clothing stores looking for new snazzy suits when I should have been working on my new novels. Then I purchased a Benclosure to keep me from leaving my house. Once I had my Benclosure, I did nothing but write. I owe my success to Benclosures! Without my Benclosure, I would just be a sharp dresser with an awesome mustache.

Thelma Oakwood Testimonial!

My name is Thelma Oakwood. For many years I treated the kids on my block heinously, taking my cue from Dorothy's neighbor. Kids these days need disipline! But it was exhausting having to keep an eye out constantly and overexaggerating offenses just to keep them scared of me. And then the kids sold lemonade on the sidewalk outside my house all summer. Whenever I shouted at them, people bought lots of lemonade. I didn't know why, but then one night I noticed them ringing my property with ash. It turns out they were earning money to buy a Benclosure! It's been the best thing for all of us. They don't ever cross the ash, and I don't have to bother with them anymore. I now spend my days in my rocking chair. Life is sweet!

Successful Benclosures!

A successful Benclosing will trap the intended individual or spirit within the ring of patented ash-like material. An exceptionally successful Benclosure will further trap the individual within a rocking chair.

Benclosures demystified!

What is a Benclosure?
A Benclosure is a ring of our special patented ash-like material. It is designed to be placed around an area in which you wish to enclose a spirit.

Why haven't I heard of Benclosures before?
Well, that could be because the term was just copyrighted on February 1, 2008, by i sell seals!

Where can I get a Benclosure?
We are currently taking pre-orders for Benclosures. Stay tuned for further details.

Welcome to Benclosures!

So, you may be asking yourself some of the following questions:

• What is a Benclosure?
• Why haven't I heard of Benclosures before?
• What will a Benclosure do for me?

Stay tuned, we have the answers to these questions and much more!